Live Me Read online

  B: In my mind, I already have. Every day. For the last month.

  Heat.

  Ping.

  B: However, maybe tomorrow morning I’ll take you up on your offer. Show you what you’ve been missing.

  Me: A little presumptuous, aren’t we?

  B: Determined. You must admit my perseverance is unsurpassed. I’ll wear you down eventually. And then I’ll wear you out ;)~

  Me: Is that a threat, Mr. Turner?

  B: That’s a promise, Miss. Ricci. A very delicious promise.

  Me: I look forward to it.

  B: Coming around I see. I knew you were a smart girl.

  Me: The smartest ;)

  B: Study session at my house tomorrow 4:00. Be there or be square. You can show me how smart you really are.

  Me: I’ll be there. See ya later, Romeo.

  I sat in the cafeteria, intently focused on pieces of folded paper that were strewn about. Blake made them for me yesterday, but for some reason the information didn’t quite sink in the same when he wasn’t with me. I smiled softly, reminiscing on our afternoon.

  Ringing my nervous fingers together, I crossed the threshold into Blake’s apartment. Without a glance at them, he took my hands in his and slid a hazelnut coffee between them. My body instantly lost its stiffness and a smile skimmed across my face at how easily he always relaxed me.

  Guiding me to the dining table, where he already had books and notes sprawled out, I noticed his apartment was surprisingly tidy for a bachelor pad and secretly wondered if he was a neat freak or if it was for my benefit.

  A slice of yellow tape caught my eye and I paused, looking down the hall. What I assumed was Blake’s bedroom door was cautioned “off limits”. I raised a questioning brow at him.

  “Just taking the necessary precautions.” A smirk donned his gorgeous lips as he led me to my seat.

  I laughed around my cup, loving his cute quirkiness and his ways of slipping himself under my skin every chance he got.

  “Don’t be boring.”

  Jace’s voice pulled me from my daydream as he plucked my study sheets from my fingers and threw them down.

  “Hey, I need those.” I swiped my hands across the table, trying to put them back in order.

  “You can have them back later, fuddy duddy.” Jace grabbed my notes once more and shoved them into his bag.

  “You’re such a bad influence.” I stuck my bottom lip out in a pout.

  “Hey, I gotta live up to my name. How can I be called the corrupter if I don’t cause any corruption? Where’s the fun in that?” He winked.

  “Yeah, yeah,” I muttered. “So what’re you up to besides ruining my academic career?”

  “Although that sounds like loads of fun,” he rolled his eyes, “I actually missed your ass, though I’m starting to regret it already.”

  “Oh stop. I missed you, too. I’ve just been busy.”

  “Think fast,” was all I heard before an apple flew at me. I instinctively reached out and snatched it with one hand before it could bounce off my forehead.

  Blake’s eyes were animated as he turned the chair next to me around and straddled it, crossing his arms over the back. “Nice catch. You play softball or something? Not many girls can catch one-handed.”

  I dropped the apple to the table and scraped my palms on my thighs to try to rid them of the offending fruit. “That wasn’t at all sexist,” I said sarcastically. “No, I don’t play softball. I’m just talented. And why, might I ask, are you throwing food at my head?”

  He grinned back. “I told you it’s my duty to feed you. You were looking a little frail sitting there, and I figured you could use a pick me up. You know what they say, an apple a day . . .”

  Jace snorted out a laugh somewhere in the back of his throat. When I snapped my head in his direction and shot him a warning glare, he looked away, whistling. I glanced back at Blake. “For your information, I’m perfectly healthy. And I’d prefer to remain concussion free. Not exactly the softest object to throw, wouldn’t ya say, killer?”

  “Sor-ry.” Blake put up his hands as if I’d offended him.

  Jace and Blake fell into back and forth banter about something, but I couldn’t concentrate. The apple sat on the table, staring at me. I tried with all my might to hold a conversation and ignore it, but my eyes repeatedly wandered back to where it rested, taunting me with its shiny glare. The harder I tried to ignore it, the more I could feel my eyes itching to glance at it again.

  My focus was now locked and I was trapped far away.

  I’m sixteen and it’s Halloween. Quarters shoved into apples peek out of a basin of water that’s stained with murky costume makeup. I stare at the red, blue, and brown swirls, dreading my turn. That thing has to be unsanitary.

  I wrap my hair into a knot and try to be conscious of the constraints of my Dorothy outfit. I hadn’t wanted to stand out, showing up to my first high school house party as a nun, and this was the least revealing of the assortment at the costume store. It seems they make everything slutty these days.

  Kneeling, I tuck the skirt into my heels, bend forward, and dunk my face, fishing around for a few desperate attempts. The water tastes like a combination of sweet, metallic, and gross old makeup. Traces of hairspray swipe along my taste buds as well.

  Through the water, I hear a muffled, familiar laugh, and I stiffen. Two fingers drag along the length of my spine and then yank my skirt from where it’s securely fastened behind my heels. Bolting up, I cough, choking on the water. His fingers find the spot between my legs and slide from the very top of my center, all the way up my slit, and then push inside me swiftly. Trying to push myself up to escape, his other hand wraps firmly around my waist, securing me to him. Still coughing, I frantically wipe away the water coming out of my nose and burning my eyes, and I try to clear away the little hairs plastered to my forehead.

  My eyes dart around the empty room. Where did everyone go?

  I try to calm my ragged breathing, water stinging my eyes and makeup running down my face. His mouth is on my ear, his hand caressing the soft flesh between my legs as if we’re sharing an intimate moment.

  When his weight leaves my back, I glance behind me.

  “Hey there, beautiful. I want you so fucking bad right now. You look tastier than any of these apples bent there on your knees. I just couldn’t help but sample the forbidden fruit.” He removes his fingers, slides them into his mouth, and then slowly drags them out, keeping his eyes on mine. Bile rises in my throat as he hovers over me and brings his hand back to cup my sex once again.

  Paralyzed, I fight the urge to heave into the colorful basin. “Please, someone’s going to see us. What’re you doing?” I can’t hide the panic in my voice.

  His eyes glaze over as he rubs my ass, staring at it. “Calm down, beautiful. They were all finished and tired of waiting for you. I sent them to do shots downstairs.”

  I’m panting, wondering how far this will go. My chin trembles as traces of salt seeps through the seam of my lips.

  Still anchored by his other arm, his hand leaves my delicate area, sliding up my ribcage, and around to the front where he grabs a handful of my breast. The crease of his smirk presses against my wet cheek and I squeeze my eyes shut, willing this not to happen.

  A sharp pinch stabs my nipple as he tweaks it, the burn of it blistering out from the center sending a small cry tumbling from my throat.

  Slowly he releases me and my body slumps forward in defeat. He hooks an arm around my waist, lifting me upright. “Come on, I can’t wait another second to feel you where I need you.”

  “Angel, did you hear me?”

  Blinking rapidly, my head snapped in Blake’s direction. Short of breath, I could feel the wildness behind my eyes. I glanced down at my white knuckles balled up in my lap and winced at the pain my fingernails had created against my palms.

  Breathe, Goddammit!

  Jace looked from me to the apple as realization finally hit him. Snatching it, he f
lipped it up in the air, caught it and took a big, overdramatic bite. He chewed for a few beats and then spit it out into the trashcan beside him with an exaggerated, “Pew. I hate apples.” Then he tossed what remained into the pail. “All gone.” He brushed off his hands and looked me dead in the eyes, willing me to come back to him.

  I took a hard gulp, attempting to steady my breath and compose myself quickly. Our eyes were still focused on one another as I nodded my head and turned my attention back to Blake, who appeared dumbfounded.

  “Did I just miss something?” he asked, glancing back and forth between me and Jace, trying to crack the secret best friend code.

  “Not at all.” I exhaled. “I just hate apples. You can keep those to yourself from now on and catalog them next to the name ‘beautiful’.” My eyes trailed back to the garbage can, wondering if there’d ever be a time I could see one of those things and not get dragged back into my past.

  Jace planted two fingers on my cheek and forced my focus back in Blake’s direction. “So you’re coming, right?” He directed the question at Blake, making a swift change of topic.

  Blake blinked at him, and then shook his head. “Where are we going again?”

  Jace rolled his eyes. “X.L. and I have it on strict authority Evangelina will be there too.”

  “Where will I be?” I looked to Jace. Clearly, I’d zoned out for that part of the conversation.

  “X.L.,” Jace annunciated. “God, doesn’t anyone listen to me?”

  I relaxed back in my seat and folded my arms across my chest. “And when exactly did I agree to be there?”

  “When you said you loved me and couldn’t live without me and wanted me to stay in this dreadful place.” Jace’s mouth split into a devious smile.

  I raised an eyebrow. “Ah, blackmail at its finest. Well played, love.”

  Jace lounged back in his chair and brushed his knuckles along his chest. “Hold the applause, please.”

  Jace looked to Blake. “Well, lover boy. You in or what?”

  “Um, yeah sure. I guess.”

  “In for what?” Eric chimed in, dropping himself in the empty chair next to Blake.

  Blake looked to his left. “Some place called X.L. Wanna come?”

  Eric’s eyebrows drew in. “Never heard of it. Is it new? I thought I knew all the hot spots around here.”

  Blake shrugged. “No clue.”

  The glint in Jace’s eye was unmistakable to me, but went unnoticed by the two unsuspecting bystanders.

  “Well, either way, I can’t make it. I got a hot date tonight.” Eric slapped Blake’s back.

  Blake rolled his eyes. “When do you not?”

  “Don’t blame me. I gotta keep the ladies satisfied. They depend on me.” Eric smiled his wicked smile and then leaned all the way back in his chair, tipping it to the point that I didn’t know how he was keeping it balanced. “Speaking of which . . .” He trailed off, bringing the chair back to an upright position and hopping off. “Gotta go. Lunch just arrived.” He darted over to the leggy blonde standing in the center of the cafeteria, searching for a place to sit, and snaked his arm around her waist.

  I looked at Blake. “He’s such a dick. How do you put up with him?”

  Blake lifted his lips in a dismissive gesture. “He’s not so bad. He’s got his issues, but I’ve known him my whole life. He’s like a brother. Once you get to know him, you’ll understand him a bit more. He’s harmless really, and he’d give you the shirt off his back. He’s just got . . . female issues, I guess you could say.”

  I shook my head. “If you say so, but he still gets under my skin.”

  “He just likes to push your buttons. Give him a chance.” He dipped his head low and gave me a small smile. “For me?”

  “I’m sure I could think of a few ways to rectify his female issues.” Jace’s eyes were glued to Eric’s lower half.

  “Behave, you,” I told Jace before turning my attention back to Blake. “So you’re definitely coming tonight then?”

  His eyes became warm. “If you’re there, I’m there. Where should I meet you guys?”

  Jace made a show of quivering as he pulled his line of sight from Eric. “Eva’s apartment at ten.” Jace gripped my arm and pulled me to my feet, then blew Blake a kiss. “Don’t be jealous. I’d still do you, too. See ya later, hot stuff.”

  Blake reached out and snatched the invisible kiss from the air and planted it on his cheek, playing into Jace’s charade. “Bye, honey,” he said in the sweetest voice possible and flitted his fingers in a wave.

  “Oh God.” I laughed at them both, wondering when they’d gotten so close. It felt good to know Blake was comfortable with Jace and not freaked out by his eccentricities, but the two of them scared me. I could barely handle them separately. Together, those two could totally railroad me if they wanted to.

  Note to self: Pay better attention to what the fuck is going on.

  How did I always get suckered into these things?

  Pulling the skin taut at the corner of my eye, I skillfully applied a thick black line across the edge of my lashes. Then I twisted the cap back on the eyeliner and dropped it into the bag on the sink. Standing back, I combed my fingers through my mane, fluffing it out as I examined my handiwork. With a pout to my lips, I glazed on some shimmer. Done.

  Wearing only a black lace bra and matching thong, I exited the bathroom as Jace walked in my apartment.

  “Hey, bitch.”

  “Hey,” I called over my shoulder as I padded down the hall toward my bedroom.

  I heard him skip up behind me. “Meow.” The swat on my ass echoed through the apartment.

  “Ouch, dick!” I rubbed the sore spot with a scowl on my face.

  “Oh, hush it. You know you loved it. Now, gimme a kiss and tell me how pretty I am.”

  I kissed his cheek. “You look fabulous. Love the mohawk.” I patted the top of his head.

  He jerked his head away from my hand like I was holding a lit torch. “Careful! Don’t mess with the masterpiece.”

  “Sor-ry. What was I thinking?” I held up my hands.

  “Get it together, girl. You know better than that.” He rolled his eyes at me, turned, and peered into the full length mirror, fingering his hair and making sure every strand was just as he’d left it.

  Stepping into my black booty shorts reserved only for these occasions, I looked at Jace’s reflection. “Poor guy has no clue what he’s in for. You didn’t tell him, did you?”

  “Hell’s no. I get few pleasures in life. Why would I give up the opportunity to see the look on his face when he figures it out?”

  With a huge smile, I shimmied into a spaghetti strapped, ice-blue silk shirt. “You’re evil. Pure. Evil.”

  “This’ll be a test of his worthiness. If he loves you, he has to love me. And if he doesn’t love me . . . well, then he can go fuck himself.” Jace fingered the corner of his mouth and puckered his lips at his reflection, then turned to the side, inspecting his ass.

  A knock at the door caught my attention. I swatted him on the shoulder and shooed him out of my way. “Go answer that. I’ll be right out.”

  Jace fawned over himself one last time, did a spin like Michael Jackson, and planted a kiss on my cheek.

  I bent down to retrieve a pair of knee high, black leather boots, as Jace trilled, “Coming, loverboy.”

  Their voices were muffled as I put the finishing touches on my ensemble. I glanced in the mirror, satisfied. “Good enough.”

  My heels clacked on the hardwood floor as I made my way to the kitchen, the good time they were having becoming more audible with every step. Glasses clinked and, as I rounded the corner, the boys brought shots of my reserves to their lips.

  Blake’s eyes locked on mine as the liquid fire went down his throat, and he choked. His hand flew up to cover his mouth as he bent forward, coughing uncontrollably.

  “You okay?” Jace pounded him on the back.

  Using the counter for support, he let out a
few more of those nasty little chokes that linger as his glassed over eyes found mine again. “Yeah, I’m okay.” He scanned the length of me, from the tips of my toes all the way to the top of my head as he regulated his breathing. “Damn, Angel. You look . . . breathtaking . . . apparently.” Another stray cough passed his bewitching lips.

  I fidgeted, swaying back and forth and picking at my nails. “Thanks. You clean up pretty nice yourself.” And man, did he ever. I tried my best to play it cool, but the boy had to have been carved from the gods themselves.

  I took in the faded jeans that hung low on his squared off hips—the hips with the perfectly placed indents at each corner. A tremor passed through me as my eyes roamed over the muscles that bulged from beneath a fitted white V-neck. He tried to cover them with a blazer, but I knew they were there, pressing up against the thin cotton.

  The smooth skin below his collarbone taunted me, begging to be nibbled. Between the round peaks of his chest lay a shiny silver cross. My fingers twitched, wanting to grab it, pull him to me and hold him there. I dug my fingernails into my palms to stop from doing just that and shifted from one foot to the other. Crossing my legs, I stood there, nervous the sensations traveling through the lower half of my body would be visible. Heated vibrations pulsed through my core making it difficult to stand, let alone hold a conversation.

  I licked my dry lips, wondering what the smooth curves of his neck tasted like, and then my eyes roamed past the juiciest lips I’d ever seen. Rosy and plump and glistening with the moisture the last swipe of his tongue had left. The rum he’d just downed probably lingered at the corners and would make them taste even sweeter. Visions of plunging my fingers into his perfectly mussed hair and anchoring him to me danced before me. It was shiny and darker than usual and styled to look as though he’d just been fucked. My sights landed on his glittery, gorgeous eyes. The shimmer of water that remained from his bout of choking was enough to make his blue diamonds dance.

  I bundled my hands into balls at my sides as my body warred with my mind. All I wanted to do was grab him, drag him to my bedroom, and put a stop to the endless torture. Tell him I surrendered and was his to do with what he wished. The pull on my soul was intense. It felt like he was reaching out for me, begging mine to meet it halfway. I don’t know what stopped me from caving right then and there, and I didn’t understand where these foreign feelings were coming from.